fyi...I understand my incredible superstition/belief in bad omens is completely embarrassing and totally ridiculous but, it's well-founded...trust me! I should have learned from my experience in Bhilai, but obviously did not. It has taken 2 months + to come to terms with my fortune teller run-in and now (I think) I'm ready to share it with it you.
This post is dedicated to my roomie and my boss, who both would have not lived with me/hired me if they had known about this "incident" earlier...that I'm sure of...because they told me.
5. The fortune teller and his words (from over two months ago, mind you) come into my head almost once a day...almost.
4. The fortune teller did not speak English or Hindi (or even English with an Indo accent) and unfortunately we do not speak Tamil, so he quickly interrupted an unassuming group of college students and made one (very kind, I might add) guy come sit next to us and agree to translate the entire "reading" before we could change our minds. I now understand, yet another situation, in which the phrase, "don't kill the messenger" actually applies and well, saved this said translator's life.
3. The fortune teller "works" with a parrot who lives in a (very small) cage pulling a card from the stack of cards on command in exchange for a small piece of a (probably old and stale) cracker. The fortune teller's parrot picked a "cobra card" out of the card pile for me. Apparently very bad.
2. The fortune teller told me not to make any important decisions for "some" time (this was during my "job hunting" job trip in December), that I'm the Bhatia family scapegoat for any problems (thanks, guys) and then, upon me picking what I was left to assume was the same "cobra card" from the pile that the parrot had previously picked, that I was under a bad omen for unintentionally hurting someone very deeply. This curse could only be removed by doing a Puja with snakes/meeting a snake charmer/very unclear exactly what would or would not qualify.
(Actually, he told me that I had accidentally knocked over a South Indian widow's special fruit offering to God in mourning of her husband...but after minutes of trying to figure out how I could have done this having been in Chennai for less than 48 hours, I was told to interpret it "figuratively").
The scariest part of the entire situation happened when I offered to pay him to "perform" this said ceremony/Puja/offering and he said he couldn't. I asked him to recommend someone (assuming he would recommend his brother or friend) and he said he didn't know. WTF?
1. The fortune teller was in my mind. I let a few days pass, but still could not shake his words, literally staying awake thinking of what would happen to me if I did not remove this said curse. After being shat on by a bird on my way down to Pondicherry, I realized that was the last straw. I forced myself to make a detour at the Crocodile Park cum Snake Milking Station and see what I could do about this situation I had "unintentionally" found myself in. After visiting (and being fascinated by) the milking station, I asked one of the men working there if I could go to the village and meet the snake catchers (catchers = charmers = bad omen breakers, right? right.) He explained the village was very close. I thought about it, but before I departed for my journey into the village, I decided it was worth my while to explain my story to this guy (mama bhatia flipped out at this part of the story...naturally).
Before the words were even completely out of my mouth, he motioned me to follow him, yelled out to a fellow snake milking station colleague and led me to a small, hidden temple next to the milking station. I covered my head with my shawl, followed his colleague and watched as he lit the diya, mumbled a prayer, placed a tikka on my head and placed the small offering I had given into the temple filled with 11 cobras that identically matched my 2 "cobra cards."
I was saved. This was it (talk about a case where 1+1=11) This was the end of my curse (knock on wood) and I promised myself never to visit a fortune teller on (Elliot) beach (again). I'm never having my fortune read, unless...the fortune teller looks really really convincing/legit and speaks my language, that is.
This post is dedicated to my roomie and my boss, who both would have not lived with me/hired me if they had known about this "incident" earlier...that I'm sure of...because they told me.
5. The fortune teller and his words (from over two months ago, mind you) come into my head almost once a day...almost.
4. The fortune teller did not speak English or Hindi (or even English with an Indo accent) and unfortunately we do not speak Tamil, so he quickly interrupted an unassuming group of college students and made one (very kind, I might add) guy come sit next to us and agree to translate the entire "reading" before we could change our minds. I now understand, yet another situation, in which the phrase, "don't kill the messenger" actually applies and well, saved this said translator's life.
3. The fortune teller "works" with a parrot who lives in a (very small) cage pulling a card from the stack of cards on command in exchange for a small piece of a (probably old and stale) cracker. The fortune teller's parrot picked a "cobra card" out of the card pile for me. Apparently very bad.
2. The fortune teller told me not to make any important decisions for "some" time (this was during my "job hunting" job trip in December), that I'm the Bhatia family scapegoat for any problems (thanks, guys) and then, upon me picking what I was left to assume was the same "cobra card" from the pile that the parrot had previously picked, that I was under a bad omen for unintentionally hurting someone very deeply. This curse could only be removed by doing a Puja with snakes/meeting a snake charmer/very unclear exactly what would or would not qualify.
(Actually, he told me that I had accidentally knocked over a South Indian widow's special fruit offering to God in mourning of her husband...but after minutes of trying to figure out how I could have done this having been in Chennai for less than 48 hours, I was told to interpret it "figuratively").
The scariest part of the entire situation happened when I offered to pay him to "perform" this said ceremony/Puja/offering and he said he couldn't. I asked him to recommend someone (assuming he would recommend his brother or friend) and he said he didn't know. WTF?
1. The fortune teller was in my mind. I let a few days pass, but still could not shake his words, literally staying awake thinking of what would happen to me if I did not remove this said curse. After being shat on by a bird on my way down to Pondicherry, I realized that was the last straw. I forced myself to make a detour at the Crocodile Park cum Snake Milking Station and see what I could do about this situation I had "unintentionally" found myself in. After visiting (and being fascinated by) the milking station, I asked one of the men working there if I could go to the village and meet the snake catchers (catchers = charmers = bad omen breakers, right? right.) He explained the village was very close. I thought about it, but before I departed for my journey into the village, I decided it was worth my while to explain my story to this guy (mama bhatia flipped out at this part of the story...naturally).
Before the words were even completely out of my mouth, he motioned me to follow him, yelled out to a fellow snake milking station colleague and led me to a small, hidden temple next to the milking station. I covered my head with my shawl, followed his colleague and watched as he lit the diya, mumbled a prayer, placed a tikka on my head and placed the small offering I had given into the temple filled with 11 cobras that identically matched my 2 "cobra cards."
4 comments:
omg. is this for real? come visit me, i will wrap a turban around my head, get a parrot from "the fish bowl" down the street, and take you to the fire truck on maple. there i will predict that you will enjoy india for a while longer, meet a fob who happens to love reggaeton, and move back to chicago where we can be neighbors and live happily ever after.
how do i follow jaimes comment. ditto.
and seriously, was that for reals?
OH MY GOD!
You leave that voodoo business in India, Pooj.
"The fortune teller "works" with a parrot who lives in a (very small) cage pulling a card from the stack of cards on command in exchange for a small piece of a (probably old and stale) cracker." Haha, this line made me laugh! Sounds downright crazy.
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